Death Wish

Death Wish (1974) – Granted, this is probably the single most influential vigilante film ever, and maybe it was shocking 40 years ago, but it feels exploitative in its oversimplified approach to complex issues, and it’s over the top even as it strives for realism; the end result is something of a comical right-wing fantasy, and the ham-fisted, dull, preachy script, subpar direction, and unbelievable casting of Bronson as a bleeding-heart liberal certainly don’t help; blink and you’ll miss Denzel. 5

Hopscotch

Hopscotch (1980) – The title doesn’t do it any favors as far as getting it noticed, but Walter Matthau is excellent, as is the rest of the cast, in this cleverly scripted, cleverly directed, wonderfully dry film from the author of Death Wish. 7

Treasure Island (1990)

Treasure Island (1990) – This is one of the most faithful adaptations out there, and with a fine cast, tight pacing, and a good score, it’s my favorite film version (my favorite version without Muppets, anyway). 7

ffolkes

ffolkes (1979) – The cat-loving, misogynistic, embroidering, egomaniacal protagonist, handled nicely by Roger Moore, is the shining highlight of this fully competent but otherwise quite generic thriller. 6

The Last Stand

The Last Stand (2013) – It’s got plenty of wooden dialogue, some nice car stunts (even if it does feel like an extended Chevy ad at times), more than a little bit of dumbness, and passable action; in sum, Arnold’s return is both perfectly watchable and perfectly forgettable. 5

Cloud Atlas

Cloud Atlas (2012) – This is a wildly ambitious film, and although none of the stories are anything to sing and dance about individually (nor do they tie together particularly well), the directors manage the storylines well enough and slow-build to a mostly satisfying payoff; the film’s real selling point, though, is the remarkable makeup gimmick: the film is filled with inexplicable gender- and race-bending casting of the same few actors – you’ll be doing well to spot just two of Hugh Grant’s characters, never mind all six – because who doesn’t want to see Halle Berry as an elderly Korean man? 6